When you are asked to write a recommendation letter, do you always say yes? If so, do you always write in positive light about that particular individual? If you said yes to both questions, why? What makes most people uncomfortable to saying no to most requests?
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I was burned once by asking for a job recommendation where I Honestly thought I’d been doing a great job. My boss said no problem…that she’d be honored to be put down as a reference. This was for a chain, by the way. I wanted to apply at another location as I was going away to college.
I kept checking back and back with the new job possibility and wondering why it was taking so long to get going with something that was somewhat of an easy transfer and I desperately needed the money and the job that I was counting on. I found out that my previous boss had gone way beyond giving me a bad recommendation. I was shocked! I had actually thought we were friends, even. At the least, I felt it would have been a lot more professional and honest to just have told me that she couldn’t give me a recommendation. Maybe even tell me why not so as to improve my job skills for the future.
Anyway, I’ve been so scarred by that experience 🙂 that now that I’m in the position of constantly being asked for recommendations that I’m totally up front about it out of basic courtesy.
Great site, btw, Milos! Keep up the great work 🙂
Author
Deborah, that must have been very uncomfortable to go through. Have you even found out why she did that, what was her reasoning for pulling that stunt? Hopefully, it all worked out for the better in the end and you are now working at a much better place. 🙂
Thank you for your kind words, I really appreciate them.
Nope, never found out why… I guess it’s always bugged me that I never knew why… the ol’ disease to please thing: I NEED everyone to like me 🙂 Oh, well…that’s not going to happen.
Anyway, all for the best. It was a REALLY tough semester because of her . Next semester, I found a better job that was a lot easier on my studies.
Now, I’m doing something I TRULY love with youth ministry, videography, web design/maintenance, social media, etc. My work with high school students (mostly) leads me to being a popular source of letters of recommedations for them. Some are extremely easy to write and others are more of a struggle 🙂 That’s one of the reasons I found your blog topic so interesting.
Author
Deborah, I’m glad to see that everything in the end worked out for the better. 🙂